This year I joked about making no resolutions beyond getting through each day as best I can. But actually there are a few simple things I’d like to try sticking to:
1. Reading more
I have started reading Blood Song by Anthony Ryan and as it’s the first of a trilogy I have high hopes for achieving this first resolution – it’s just a question of finding the time in the day and choosing the book over the remote control after my boy is in bed! Watch this space…
2. Spending less time on my phone
Spending less time on my phone is a must. We all act like drug addicts clutching our phones everywhere we go, scrolling aimlessly through other people’s lives whilst ignoring our own but I’m determined not to waste so much time on social media, news and other apps in 2018! You heard it here first.
I have started leaving my phone in another room when I am with my little boy at home so I’m not tempted to pick it up and start scrolling or seeing what memes I’ve been tagged in. None of these things matter when I’m missing valuable time watching my boy develop and play and learn new things. He’s already changing before my very eyes every day, I don’t want to miss a thing.
3. Cutting back on sugar
Cutting back on sugar would benefit my health and waistline immensely so I’ve made a list of all the things I like to eat that contain sugar and will replace each one with a less sugary alternative.
4. Writing more
This is is another must. I write lots at work so tend to lack inspiration by the time I’m home. I have been writing a little every day – sometimes just notes about my day. Every minute I spend writing is useful and I have this wonderful blog to maintain and keep populated with content so I can’t ignore this resolution!
5. Being a less shouty mum
This last one fills me with shame – because I never thought I would be a shouty mum, because I was shouted at a lot as a child and hated it so I always said I wouldn’t do it. I still silently judge mums who shout at their kids in public, but came very close to losing my shit and screaming at mine in public a few times in the latter part of last year as my goblin became a proper toddler, desperate for independence.
I became increasingly stressed by his whinging and increasingly angry at his (totally normal toddler) disobedience and boundary pushing. It started with a snap here and there and got to the point where I was shouting at him pretty much every day. And every time I raise my voice or hiss angrily at him to stop, I feel shame and guilt course through me and I am left feeling angry with myself.
Shouting at a small child is counter productive and frankly not good for morale. When you read articles like ‘Loud But Not Proud’ during one of the riddled with guilt moments, you worry about the effect the shouting has. I’ve managed many times to breathe deeply and avoid shouting so I know I can do it. Its just when life gets hectic, we’re late, sleep deprived and feeling overwhelmed, it’s easy to lose your temper and shout. So this is my most important resolution. Zac (and most other kids I’m sure) respond better to being talked to calmly and listened to – so shouting at him will do nothing to solve whatever it is that I’m even shouting about.
What are your resolutions for this year?